So, hands up if you remember your first ever talk about "The birds and the bees"....?!Well if you have, then kudos for sitting through three hours of gruelling non-graphic, dad/mom-not wanting-to hit-the -punchline-while-trying-really-hard to-make-the-point pep talk! It couldn't have been easy, i know, for I too have been a victim of "The Talk"! Now, if you're lucky you would've by some form of miraculous favour, dodged the fatal bullet that is "The Talk". But I, perfect child that i then was, was accursed to have sat through it twice...once when i turned thirteen and again when i gained admission to university, you'd think it gets easier to listen to with time.THINK AGAIN.
Truth is, most of us already knew so much about the birds and the bees before dad/mom debated on who'd be better suited to go in, sometimes unable to conclude, they both knock on the door ,walk in, sit on the bed, ask you to sit between them, make a little idle talk like: when did you get all grown and so beautiful/handsome, etcetera, then just before the walls start closing in, the air becomes thin and they tell you how babies are made... yeah. Anyways because the parents are trying extra hard not to be too direct the message is either never passed or comprehended, most times they stop, not knowing how to progress.
To be fair, they really are giving a hundred percent, they just aren't very good at it, amidst the long pauses, inapprporiate examples,and impossible parables, we cut them some slack and say "I get it" ( no small thanks to the TV, internet, magazines etc).The look of relief on their faces is and always will be one for the history books.
It might be the most dreaded thing after the plague, but the talk is kind of like world tradition...
Posts
